People often say that “it takes a village to raise a child”. I’ve always loved that. My husband and I are responsible for raising our kids but I know that they will get to a point where they will not want to hear what we have to say….well maybe they came out of the womb not wanting to hear what we have to say. I want my kids to be surrounded by people who love them and will speak truth to them. I know that they will benefit from a “village” of people pouring into them.

This past Sunday I listened to a message that touched on how our view is shaped by our relationships and experiences. As I watched and listened I was reminded of all the amazing people who have impacted my life. I was instantly overwhelmed with gratitude.

I was born into an amazing family with two loving parents who regularly told me I was amazing, beautiful and filled with potential. They told me that I could do anything as long as I worked hard, and I believed it. That probably would have been enough but thankfully through my teens God placed coaches, teachers and mentors in my life that believed in me, prayed for me and poured into me. Their words have stuck with me my whole life and helped shape who I am. I’m sure my parents were telling me the same things but for whatever reason we don’t always want to hear our parents so I’m so grateful that I had a village.

I want to share these truths and lessons as a way to honor and thank the people who have had a positive impact on my life.

You are a queen and you deserve a king.

I pray that my girls tuck this away in their hearts. God has chosen someone amazing for them and they do not need to waste time or expose their heart to the pain of wasting time with men who will not measure up. I had a few missteps, a few poor choices but I truly believed that God had someone amazing for me and that I deserved someone who would treat me like a queen.

No one’s going to die.

I am a stress ball sometimes. I am also a control freak. If I were to assign a value to situations between 1 and 10, 1 being not important and 10 being the most important thing ever, I’m usually treating everything as an 11. I remember my senior year of high school I received my first B+ on a report card. Up until that point I had only received As. To say I was devastated would be an understatement (it was high school, it felt like a big deal at the time). I was freaking out and crying and a teacher talked to me. He asked me if I was hurt - no. He asked me what the consequence would be of getting this B+ - nothing. He told me that it didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things and forget about it. It’s so obvious and simple but it completely changed my perspective on things moving forward. A mentor reminds me of this truth regularly but puts it like this - no one’s going to die. It’s a waste of time stressing over silly things that you have no control over and don’t have major consequence.

Don’t justify or rationalize

If you have to justify why you are doing something - maybe rethink what you’re doing or why you’re doing it. If you have to justify your attitude - maybe check your heart. Seek the truth and act on the truth. It is so easy to get offended and defensive when we are faced with the truth. When I find myself going down the path of excuses there is a little voice in the back of my mind saying, “don’t justify, don’t rationalize”.

In everything you do - do it with a whole heart

This one is not an original but it is truth. Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters”. I am not much of a people pleaser but if I’m being really honest with myself I do want the approval of others. I want people to be impressed by me. I know that sounds gross because it is. I have to regularly do a self check on this. It’s not enough for me to give my best to do everything to the best of my ability. I need to check my motives and to make sure that I remember who I serve.

To whom much is given, much is required.

This is also not an original, it’s straight from Jesus. I believe that the gifts and talents I have were given to me by God. These were given to me, not earned or deserved and it’s my responsibility to use them to honor Him. I don’t believe that we should hide or apologize for the gifts we have been given. We shouldn’t hide them away and downplay them. When you use the gifts you have been given it can bless others so don’t hide.

This week as I continue to reflect on the message from last Sunday I keep asking myself what is required of me? To whom much is given, much is required. My life has been impacted so much by the people God placed in my life. The ripple effect of their influence has impacted my relationships, my marriage, my kids and it will impact my kid’s kids. I’ve been given so much, what am I doing it?